Autism and the Yardstick We Measure it By

Here’s the thing about social norms: they’re weird. As the CEO of Autism Insights Foundation, I’ve seen time and time again how neurodiverse individuals get labeled as “rude” or “unsociable” for doing things that, honestly, make perfect sense when you think about it. But here’s a radical idea: what if, instead of questioning the person, you questioned the yardstick you’re using to measure them?

Let me break it down. Imagine you’re at a fancy dinner party, and someone walks in wearing sneakers. The horror! Social norms say that’s a no-go. But what if their sneakers are way comfier, make them happy, and help them navigate the slippery floor better than your wobbly dress shoes? Suddenly, the “rude” one is actually the genius. That’s kind of what it’s like when we judge autistic behaviors by neurotypical standards.

For example, maybe someone skips the small talk and gets straight to the point. Neurotypicals might call that blunt; I call it efficient. Or maybe someone stims in a meeting to stay focused, and others think it’s “distracting.” Newsflash: it’s way less distracting than a three-hour meeting that could’ve been an email. These behaviors aren’t wrong—they’re just different, and they often make a lot of sense if you look at them from the right angle.

The problem is, we’ve been using the wrong measuring stick. We expect everyone to fit into the neurotypical box, forgetting that people on the spectrum bring their own tools, strategies, and rhythms to the table. Instead of asking, “Why aren’t they doing it this way?” maybe we should be asking, “Why are we so obsessed with doing it that way?” Spoiler alert: the world won’t implode if we expand our idea of what’s acceptable.

So next time you see someone doing something that feels “off,” pause before jumping to conclusions. Maybe it’s not rude—maybe it’s genius. Let’s retire the outdated yardsticks and start appreciating people for who they are, sneakers and all. Because let’s be honest, nobody likes wobbly dress shoes anyway.

#RethinkNormal #InclusionMatters #AutismAcceptance #DifferentNotLess #AutismInsightsFoundation